Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Another Manchurian Candidate?

Another Manchurian Candidate?
I don’t know if you notice it too, but the problem with the election so far is that the Reps are moving far, far to the left of the Dems. I sniff a complot.
They’ve already embraced socialism and free sex. Their God only knows what’s next. The Karl Marxization of our economy is proceeding apace with the announcement that Bush administration is effectively nationalizing the home mortgage industry by way of a takeover of Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac. Uncle Sam will be owning more of our homes than there are people in communist Cuba.
This follows on the Fed’s bailout of investment banks on St. Patricks Day. That had the effect of making our equity and credit markets, the heartbeat institutions of capitalism, more like those in China than anything Donald Trump might recognize.
Put another way, your money in the bank, the house over your head and the direction of our nominally free enterprise economy are now under the control of big government bureaucrats, the same people that generations of conservatives decried as the most incompetent and ill-intentioned in America.
And who put them in charge? Not revolutionary hordes marching on Wall Street with blood in their eyes and pitch forks in their hands. No, it was the conservatives themselves who put us in the thrall of the pointy heads of the all encompassing state.
Socialism it truly is, folks. Thank God it’s only for the wealthy. The guys in charge know you ordinary folks wouldn’t feel right if the government gave you a free pair of glasses or a cane for grandma. That’s not American. The country will continue to operate on the three separate economic systems we all know and love: socialism (now expanded) for the rich, cut-throat capitalism for the middle class, and bottom-of-the-barrel feudalism for the poor.
On an equally important topic, the conservatives have apparently abandoned their insistence on abstinence--at least for Alaskan adolescents. Ghetto brats may still be reviled for the ruination of the nation for knocking up their high school hook-ups, but if you’re a rouge cou like Levi Johnstone, your swordsmanship gets saluted on national tv by John McCain.
To quote the father of the year: “I’m a f**kin’ redneck who likes to snowboard and ride dirt bikes. But I live to play hockey. I like to go camping and hang out with the boys, do some fishing, shoot some sh*t and just f**kin’ chillin’, I guess.”
Johnstone’s emphasis on leisure activities over hard work and entrepreneurial success reeks of European-style social democracy to me. Tote that up with the socialization of housing and finance and I think we may have a new Manchurian candidate in former red brain washee John McCain. If he wins the election, we might just all become Vietcong.