Tough Tooties
  Polls tell us that Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is by far the most popular pol in the country. People think she’s doing a crackerjack job of running foreign policy. Then again, polls say that Americans don’t give a Chihuahua’s turd about foreign policy.
    Now, just because we’re not interested in the other 95 percent of humanity with their un-American ways and historical sob stories, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t get tough with them. Especially at election time. As Willard Romney promises, he'll  “shape” the world to fit our "interests."
    He'll do that with "leadership." Unless you’re a foreign policy maven, you may not know about the Great Global Ballot of 1999 (or was it 1899?) in which 99.7 percent of the people on earth voted the U.S. and whoever happens to be its president as their permanent leader. Anti-American troublemakers say that’s just a fabulated crock. But even if they’re right, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t drone them.
    At the risk of making us instantly cop z's in front of the flat screen, Barry Obama and Willard Romney spent 90 minutes Monday night debating the best ways to get tough with all those foreigners we lead.  That’s about 88 minutes more than most Americans can tolerate on that subject.     
     In case you slumbered through it, my favorite moment was delivered by Romney.  After forcefully dictating to Iran and China, and after strongly criticizing Barry for weak dictation, Willard put the cherry on the lemon and lie pie by emphatically denying that the U.S. dictates to other countries.
    My second favorite was when Barry and Willard kept one-upping about who wants to “strangle” Iran more. Perhaps they had forgotten in the excitement of the campaign that “strangling” countries was an act of war and, indeed, a war crime. 
    Well, no matter. Happily, we won’t have to bother ourselves about foreign policy for another four years. Then, in 2016, some presidential hopeful, maybe even Hillary, can warn that the Iranians are eight years closer to getting a bomb.